feels like home

Some music feels like home. At the end of a long, full weekend (bringing a group of teenage students to NYC for a packed 2-day adventure), a few tracks of headphone-ed refreshment helped me make it through the final stretch on Sunday night. 

Today I hope you get at least a few moments that feel like home. Whether that means plugging in or unplugging or something altogether different, claim it. I'm going to try to. 

I get a bit more work done every day... and I'm holding on tight to my soul. 

joy kills sorrow

On particularly difficult days, I tend to focus on simple things. Things like how dry my hands are and how I really like this scarf. I shamelessly pick cookie dough pieces out of the ice-cream and spend too much time editing photos. I focus on things that don't really matter. Not to say I'm anti-fashion or downing the importance of ice-cream. Believe you me, I am a staunch proponent of wearing quality things and eating tasty things too. But, it hurts to think about what matters. Its achey and tiring to acknowledge loss. Its infuriating to wrestle with injustice. Life can be weary-making.

I had a weary-making weekend. We got painful family news, on both sides of our little family, and I found myself tearing up during the football game. I have no interest in football. For me, watching a game is like watching blurs on a screen for a couple hours- I just don't follow it, especially with weariness behind my eyes. Yet, it may have seemed that I was particularly moved by the Patriots victory last night. Tears in my eyes, wine glass in hand, I sat on my husband's lap as cheers erupted around me. 

And it was good. It was simple and safe and easy. Sometimes it is better to let things settle in before you acknowledge them fully. More often, it just takes time for the acknowledgment to really happen. My gosh, I feel as if we're just really coming around to Jake's MS diagnosis and that happened two years ago.